Love, Ty & Kaddie: Charlie's Birth Story

Warning - this post is very long!

My baby is 2 months old. I have wanted to write this down for the past 8 weeks. The greatest day of my life. The day that I cherish more than any other day. The day that I wish I could relive. The day I became a mama. I don’t want to forget that day. Already my memory is hazy, and I think of May 7th often. So here we are 8 weeks later, and I am going to tell Charlie’s birth story.

The beginning of my labor was very putsy-putsy, therefore so is the beginning of the story...

Wednesday, May 7th. My due date. I woke up at 6:00am, or maybe I was woken up by what I thought were Braxton-Hicks contractions. I could tell that they were regular so I downloaded an app and begun timing them. They were about a minute long and just about every 9 minutes. I called my husband at 7:00 and told him that I was having regular Braxton-Hicks so it could be something, but it probably was nothing because they felt the exact same as they have since I first got them 8 weeks pregnant. Regardless, I told him he might just want to check his phone a little more frequently throughout the day. Ty continued about his day and I decided to go about mine. I decided that the best thing to do was to sleep and drink water, so that is what I did. My minute long contractions every 9ish minutes lasted until around 8:30. They then spread out to about every 20 minutes. At 9:00 I was sick of having BH contractions and was sure that it wasn’t real labor so I took my dog and went for a walk. If it was real labor then a walk would speed things up, if it wasn’t then hopefully they would go away. After our walk my contractions stopped - for 78 minutes and 11 seconds. At 10:00am they started up again. Still not painful. Still a minute long. The only difference was that this time they were all over the place - they ranged from 10-30 minutes apart. During this time I did what any sensible person would do and googled “what do real contractions feel like?” To my disappointment everything that was being described was not like I was experiencing. I had do pain on my sides or back, just tummy tightenings. From 2:00-5:00pm my contractions became even more strange. There would be anywhere from 4-27 minutes in-between contractions. My husband came home from work around 4:30. He was as giggly as a school-girl. He thought for sure today was the day. Me on the other hand? I was certain it was not. I felt bad because I was sure that I was only going to disappoint him. Finally, a little after 5:00 my contractions started to become a little more consistent and a little more painful (emphasize a little).

Every Wednesday we get together with my family for dinner. However, as we were getting ready to leave I started to feel nauseous, but I was positive I was not in labor so off to dinner we went. On our way to dinner, really only 2 minutes down the road, I started to have second thoughts. Then we hit a bump in the road right during a contraction. It hurt. I didn’t feel well. I surely wasn’t in labor, but with the help of my husband we decided to go home. We called my family and informed them that I was not feeling well and would not be at dinner. We didn’t mention that I was having contractions because I honestly still thought it wasn’t going to turn into anything. We got home around 6:00pm. My contractions were still lasting a minute long, but were now more consistently 8ish minutes apart. (Neither my husband, nor I remember what we did for dinner, although I must have had some broccoli. All we remember is that he was working on something in the basement and I was trying to pass time by researching false labor on the internet.) It was shortly after we got home that the contractions started to hurt more as well. Still not painful. I was still happy as a lark in-between contractions. I just had to sway and lean on something during them. Seriously though, I wasn’t in labor. I had no bloody show, my water hadn’t broken, and my back felt great. Those darn BH contractions were just getting me ready for the real deal that would maybe come someday soon.

At 7:00pm I was really sick of having contractions so I called our Bradley Method instructor and ask for her opinion on what to do. She told me to try showering and that it should either speed things up or slow things down. At 7:14 I got in the shower. As soon as the water hit my skin I went into active labor. Luckily Ty was up stairs with me. He timed contractions for me and offered encouraging words. Thanks to the contractions the shower took me an hour long. My contractions started as being one minute long and 5 minutes apart. By the end of the shower they were still one minute long, but only 2.5 minutes apart. It was during the shower that I thought I may perhaps be in labor, but only maybe. Shortly after 8:00pm we called Birth Care and let them know that I was having consistent contractions. The mid-wife on call encouraged to maybe stay at home a little longer, but to ultimately to do what we thought was best. I was still happy and talking in-between contractions so we decided we would stay at home a while longer. While I had been in the shower Ty had begun packing the last minute items in our bags. After we got off the phone with the midwife I decided I would try to lay down and rest in bed for a while. WRONG IDEA. Cue strong contractions, serious nausea, and uncontrollable shakes. Never ever fight a contraction. I only had to fight half of one to know that it hurts one gazillion times more. During that moment of fighting against my body and not letting it work, I felt why women take drugs. I vowed in that moment to never fight another one. After the next contraction I knew we had to leave now. (May I just mention that it was also after this contraction that I noticed the extremely worried and concerned look on my puppy’s face as he tried to snuggle my hand.) Although right after that contraction I wasn’t sure we should go yet. However, the next one helped convince me. Ty finished packing the car and I slowly made my way downstairs - definitely not happily talking in-between contractions anymore. As we were leaving our house I remember saying “I’m not sure we should go in yet” and “I think I need to push” within a few seconds of each other. (Looking back now that urge to push was just Charlie moving lower.) Luckily, I have a fantastic husband who calmly reassured me that we would always come home if we went in to early, and that we weren’t going to be hurting anything. Meanwhile, in his head, my feel-like-pushing comment was freaking him out a little. (He always said it would be fun to deliver in the car.)

The car ride to the birthing center seem like a blur. I do not really remember anything other then the two times Ty had to brake a little harder than I liked. All I remember is not wanting to get out of the car once we got there. However, as I slowly made my way in (I am not sure if Ty was helping me or getting things out of the car.). From the time I got out of the car until I was in bed (I literally just had to walk there which was not far at all) I had four contractions. They were coming strong and fast. During this short, but killer walk I used four different Bradley positions - ones I thought I would never do. By the time I got in the bed and was checked I was 7cm dilated! It was only then that I realized that I was going to see my baby soon. From the time I fought the one contraction at home until I began pushing, I believe I was in transition. I was confused and not sure of anything, extremely nauseous, and shaking. I wasn’t sure I wanted to get in the jacuzzi (something I always wanted to do), but the midwife decided she would go ahead and fill it for me awhile. As soon as it was full my husband and I decided to get in. Let me tell you - best decision! My contractions were still strong and fast, but being in the water with Tyler behind me made it so easy to relax. We labored in the jacuzzi for over an hour, Ty coaching me through breathing and offer encouraging words the whole time. Our midwife let us labor alone, only coming when called or when it was time to get Charlie’s heart-rate. Our midwife, Dana McDonald was fantastic. Seriously, the best! She was so chill and encouraging!

After being in the jacuzzi for a while I got very nauseous and became sick. Luckily, I made it into a bowl. (Full on transition, folks.) Finally, after being in the tub for about 45 minutes I had a little bloody show. Shortly after that I began to feel the urge to push/ poop. Dana came in to check me, but I was only 8 or 9 cm, not quite complete. The next 20 minutes were probably the most uncomfortable part of the whole labor and delivery - I did not feel like I was working with my body anymore. I really wanted to push, but knew I probably shouldn’t if I wasn’t complete. I tried some different positions in the tub, but could not find anything that I liked. I also thought for sure that I was going to poop, and I did not want to poop in the tub, so we moved into the bathroom and I labored on the toilet for awhile. The toilet was not fun. I could not get comfortable and I really just wanted to push. After about 10 minutes on the toilet, I decided to get back on the bed. Before I was actually in labor, I always wanted to delivery in a jacuzzi in the squat position. For some reason, when I was actually in labor, that is not what I did at all. I did not want to get back in the jacuzzi because the water was pretty yucky looking. I tried one contraction in the squat position (on my way back to the bed) and for some reason I did not like it (not sure why, maybe I was just concentrating on getting into the bed).

When I finally got back into the bed Dana checked me again and thank the Lord I was complete and could begin pushing. I ended up pushing in traditional style (last position I ever thought I would deliver in) with Tyler behind me (we both really wanted Tyler to catch Charlie, but in the moment I need him behind me). My contractions continued one after the other during pushing. For the first two contractions, I was still figuring out how to push - I would take about 4 or 5 breathes during the contraction. By the third contraction I started to figure it out and pushing became more successful and relieving. Finally, after a few contractions my water finally broke - right on Dana and flowed back to Tyler. In the moment I was not thinking about how long I was going to be pushing for, but I remember Ty looking at the clock and saying that he had 30 minutes to come on his due date. Dana promptly said that there was not doubt in her mind that he would be here by then. I couldn’t believe that I was less than 30 minutes from meeting my baby! After one contraction Dana took my hand and let me feel his hairy little head. She also let me look with a mirror. I wish I could have looked and touched him more, but my contractions were coming too fast to really take much in. One contraction and his head was half out. Another and his whole head and arm were out. In between contractions he decided to turn his whole head and arm (ouch!). One more contraction and I heard my baby cry and felt him on my chest! In total, I only pushed for 20 minutes. Thinking about that moment still gives me chills and brings tears to my eyes!

Charlie was healthy and perfect and beautiful. The next hour or so was a blur. All I remember is staring at my beautiful baby boy. At some time, that I do not remember, Ty got up and took pictures (thank goodness!). After they checked him temp and heartrate, they left our new little family alone to take it all in. I will forever cherish those first moments together. It was perfect. Just the three of us. After about an hour they took Charlie to do measurements (only a few feet away where I could watch everything). He was 7lbs 9.5oz, 20 1/4” long. After that Tyler held him skin to skin while they took care of me. They continued to monitor us for the required 4 hours (that turned into 5) and we left at 5:00 am.

Charlie’s birthday was the best day of my life. My whole life I was afraid of delivering a baby - I believed the lie that society tells us. However, L&D was anything but that lie. It was beautiful and it was what my body is suppose to do. I know that whoever is reading this will probably not believe this, but it really was not that painful. Right after delivering him I was relieved, yes, but I also was ready to do it again three days later (and I tore badly).

May 7, 2014 was the most beautiful day. I am so blessed that the Lord blessed me with being a mama to my Charles.